An Expensive Lesson

Last night I began my session by immediately dropping $50 on a hand. I got a bit unlucky when a donk caught two pair when I had him dominated, but that's poker.

Then, as usual, things turned around, and I quit for dinner around +$25. Returning to the game, I swung down to -$25 for the day, then ran it up to +$144 when I check/raised the flop all-in with Ace of Clubs on a 3-club flop against an extremely aggro player and he paid me off with an OESD (ace high wins).

I dropped a few bucks from there, and then once again got into it with the aggro player. I was sitting on $210 and he had me covered. Note, this is not how to play a hand... its awful on my part but I was blinded because the action player was in the hand and I had my dad watching the game over my shoulder.

I raise to $4 with A8o from the SB with no limpers and the BB (action guy) min raises to $7, I call.
($15) Flop: T-8-x 2 clubs.
I check, Villain bets $20, I call
($55) Turn: BLANK I check, Villain checks (BELLS SHOULD GO OFF HERE BUT THEY DIDNT)
($55) River: CLUB I bet $40, Villain raises to $200, I call?!?

Now, that's as bad a hand as I've played in a long time... yes, I admit I played it like an IDIOT and I deserved to lose every cent in front of me. I started to play tilty on my tables in the next 10 hands and quit quickly when I realized I was being over-aggro in anger. Unfortunately that hand cost me $210, but here's the lesson...

I do not play well with people watching me play my cards. It was true at the Degree Poker tournament, and it was true a few weeks ago when I dropped $350, and it's true last night when I played this hand. There's some part of me that wants to impress the people watching by "outplaying" the players, when all i'm doing is outplaying myself. And, what I end up doing is paying other players and looking like I dont know what im doing.

I'm not sure why it's any different when I play alone, but it is, and measurably different at that. I think the fact of the matter is that somewhere in my head, I believe that folding in front of a "sweater" means losing -- and I don't enjoy losing so I don't fold when I need to. Laying down hands when you should know you're beat is key to being a good player, and sometimes I act like i'm not a good player.

Then tilt sets in because I played it like an idiot. The way the cards fall can be unfair sometimes, but that's poker... but when *I* donk it up, that really upsets me...

So, this lesson has cost me a few hundred of the bankroll. I certainly hope the realization helps to fix the problem.

Hopefully will be playing some B&M tonight and tomorrow -- the yankees on thanksgiving should provide some solid fishing... but who knows if i'll get anything to play with.

Still plugging leaks... lots to go... Toast.

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